Halfway through our Memoirs of an Addict series, we decided to take a break from the series for the day and put out something a little more positive. Let us know your thoughts, and as always share with anyone who might benefit from our message!
“There are winners and losers in life kid, that’s just the way it is.” I don’t know who came up with the quote, or if I just turned it into a quote for the purpose of this piece, but it’s a common belief in life. Think for a moment how often we apply this concept to our life, our gain comes at the expense of another. In economic theory, a zero-sum game is a representation of a situation in which each participant’s gain or loss of utility is exactly balanced by the losses or gains of the utility of the other participants. This is our default approach to life. But what if it was bullshit? If you believe in order to “win” at life someone has to lose; if you find it hard to feel happy for others success; or if you have a hard time sharing credit or recognition then I need you to sit down for this. I understand that it’s not you’re not happy for others, you just don’t understand why you can’t find equal success or recognition but you’re doing it wrong. These are signs you’re operating on a scarcity mindset. Other signs include substance abuse, overall tenseness, low energy, and compulsions to consume. In my case, this came down to one thing: a fear of loss.
Just now I witnessed an entire evening of pent-up rage and frustration over a lost car key. The tragedy is not the misplaced key, easily enough replaced, it is the wasted night. This is a prime example. You might suffer from a scarcity mentality if you can relate, what if there was an alternative, abundance mindset. Breathe deeply and imagine everyone having exactly what it was they wanted. A state of mind where victory equaled success for all those involved, no longer a need to group winners and losers. Growth, development, and opportunity are no longer finite with an abundant state of mind. They are limitless. Stop wasting your time bickering over whose way is better and realize there is a holy third option for things to get done: your way, my way, and a better way. Failure, just like everything else in life, is an opportunity. View it as such and shift from a reactive to proactive, state.